supportively | 001 ( video )

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— this can really record what I'm saying?

[It takes a bit of time before the journal gets into focus revealing a dark haired woman who is now in view, it was obvious she had never used anything like the journal from the momentary glimpse of curiosity with her expression and that she is extremely calm about her arrival for the most part]

Oh! There we go. This is working, isn't it? Now I think I've heard the basics about this place but that hardly makes this anymore reassuring if we're to stay here. It's a bit worrying actually since I have a family to get back to, after all.

If these are supposed to be used for communication, I'm guessing people can hear me through this? I'm not sure whether I know anyone here yet but this seems be the way to find out— I'm looking for two of my sons or anyone who would be from Konoha? I'd really grateful for any help at all.

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Oh sweetheart, I missed you too. [Maybe she did just saw him this morning before he went off to school but it felt like forever to her at that moment given the current circumstances that she had come to learn where a part of coming to this place.

Mikoto isn't bothered how tight he is hugging her considering she hugs him back almost as much when the tears start to stream down his face] It's okay. I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere.

[A quiet noise chokes in the bottom of Sasuke's throat when she says she's not going anywhere. He knows she can't promise that - knows it far too well.]

I h-haven't seen you in -

[Gods. Does she know?]

When... Mom, wh-what's the last thing before you came here?

[Fuck, he can't stop shaking.]

[His reaction doesn't go unnoticed especially since he was shaking a bit and honestly it's more than a bit worrying from her end] The last thing I remember? It was nothing different than usual, I was at home and I think it was around the time you would have probably just been on your way home from school.

[She moves back just slightly, so she can reach up to gently wipe the tears from his face] Now let's get inside first, then we can talk a bit more.

[Fucking hell. She doesn't know.]

[He jumps a little when she reaches up to wipe away his tears. It's been so many years since he's seen that gesture from her... He doesn't pull away, no, still while she moves, though a shudder shakes down his frame when she pulls away. This is all so surreal.]

[And he's going to have to tell her just why this is fucking him up so much.]

[He nods at her suggestion, stepping in and waiting for the door to close until he speaks. But as soon as it has - he jumps right to it. His voice is quiet, but very, very steady.]

What do you know about a coup?

[After she wipes the tears from his face, she closes the door after Sasuke steps inside, her worry about him increasing just from noticing his reactions to her and not knowing why especially since she had never seen him react like that before even from what she last remembers of him.

The question that he immediately asks of her does surprise her but maybe given the time difference between them, it was possibly something he'd already know about but whatever this was about she could tell it was something serious.

She pauses for a moment debating how to respond to that before she finally answers] I know enough. You're referring to what your father was planning against the village, right?

Yeah.

[A beat.]

Konoha found out.

[He's not looking at her anymore. And he doesn't mention Itachi just yet. Telling your mother that her other son got her killed? No. It doesn't feel right.]

They did? [Maybe it was inevitable they would and as far as the consequences of that go she has a feeling it wasn't anything good] I'm assuming that is how you know as well, but what happened?

[There is absolutely no gentle way about this.]

They decided the answer was to eliminate the entire clan.

I haven't seen you since my seventh birthday.

[If anything didn't make sense to her prior to Sasuke's explanation, it does now including most of the reactions she got from both her sons and even others from Konoha because that meant she had been killed too, didn't it? The fact that the village knew just like Sasuke had mentioned, it made sense that was what it let to but it didn't make it any less shocking to say the least.

Mikoto is trying really hard not to cry as the expression on her face was soon replaced by sadness and all she can think of was the fact she was absent from both Sasuke and Itachi's life. Everything she missed out on from seeing the two of them grow older to the age they were now which is pretty overwhelming for her to process.

Despite all that, it's not herself she's concerned about though— it's actually both Sasuke and Itachi. Judging from the fact they were both older, she could only assume it meant they both survived somehow] The entire clan, but that's— but what about you and Itachi?

[Hearing Mikoto's voice like that breaks something deep inside of Sasuke. It's a sound he never wanted to hear.]

[His eyes are already the edge of damp again when he looks up, and the look on her face is even worse than the sound of her voice. Part of him wishes he could take it back. He doesn't want to be responsible for her being in this much pain. The rest of him knows this is what needs to be done. He won't lie about what happened. There's been far, far too much lying about this in his life.]

Itachi and I survived. Just us.

[Well, that's not the whole truth, but further explanation will have to come after...]

I... I think you should talk to niisan. You should hear from him first why it was just us.

[He wants nothing more to hug her. But he's the one who made her cry, so he can't even bring himself to reach out.]

So you weren't— I'm glad. [She is still a bit shaken from hearing what happened to the clan but she looks relieved to know that she was right to assume both of them survive because of course that is what she is most worried about. She can only imagine how hard it must have been for Sasuke to tell her at all but she is glad that he did

At the mention of asking Itachi why they both survived, she wonders moment why she he couldn't just tell her himself but she doesn't ask that of him, instead she just nods] I'll ask him.

[Mikoto is still caught up in trying to process this and not cry at the same time so she does what she can actually do and she hugs him again] Sasuke, I'm so sorry that I wasn't there for you both.

[Sasuke isn't looking at her. He can't. So her hug catches him by surprise, enough so that he jumps a little. But when she speaks? It's that which makes the tears start tumbling fresh down his cheeks again.]

No, Mom - don't - it's not -

[He wants to say it's not your fault but he doesn't know who is to blame anymore. If anyone is - though that's the thing, isn't it? No one is, no one person, and that's what's worst about this. It's the system's fault, the village's twisted hierarchy and all of its bullshit. If the Uchiha hadn't been ostracized as police - but then, where would they have been instead?]

[He doesn't have the words for this, for any kind of explanation. So he just lifts his arms to hold her again, close enough to rest his cheek against her hair.]

I'm sorry I couldn't stop it.

[All this was just so heartbreaking for Mikoto as Sasuke starts crying while hugging her back. She can't help but apologize especially upon knowing this the only place she would even see him all grown up like this compared to when she last saw him.

With the consequences of what happened due to Konoha finding out about the coup, it's something Mikoto does blame herself for because whether she agreed with it or not, she had to support her husband and she wonders if maybe she had said something to Fugaku then things could be different instead of how the end of it all resulted in leaving both her sons on their own with only each other.

Hearing Sasuke apologize for not being able to stop it, that's when tears start to form in her eyes and she just tightens her hug] Sasuke— no, please don't. It's not your fault either.

[Sasuke's breath hitches at that. Hitches hard, and his grip tightens in the hug. When the hitch breaks, something rattles loose in his chest, and his next breath is a sob.]

[Hearing his mother telling him not to blame himself flies in the face of everything he's believed for the last ten years, and he has absolutely no idea how to handle that.]

If I'd been stronger... if I'd known...

[If he'd been stronger he wouldn't have had to be practicing until too late at night for it to matter. He doesn't know what he could have done had be been there, but fuck, he could have tried.]

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